today my goals are:

starting the head of
the house finch

1. to open the amazon account that i need to start the kickstarter 
2. to record at least draft 1 on the voice over

i had a lot of person set backs with this project, not as much with the paintings, more with the 'fly the nest' part of it....where i try and get it out into the world
i think that part of that is me

goldfinch

it's pretty scary out in the big world and they are all such YOUNG paintings...( ok humor me, i do spend a LOT of time over them)

but today is another step closer to them going out into the world.

while waiting for my voice to return

house finch on rough press paper

so i can record this voice over...... (i am wondering if, perhaps i should just do it with music and insert black frames with type, like old timey silent movies)
i figured i would talk a bit about watercolor paper and a bit about the differences etc.
watercolor paper is usually 100% cotton, and is specified by weight, and surface finish


i tend to use 140# hp (hot press) some folks use lighter 90# and some use heavier
a lot of artists like the texture of rough press paper, and i do too but it doesn't lend itself to easy reproduction of my paintings - see that house finch...look at the sky closely.....see the texture? now in person that texture just sparkles....... but i don't truly like it in scans as well..... and i have to correct for it.
(when the originals go up for sale though, someone is going to love it, i would bet on it)

cardinal on hot press paper

now here on the other hand is a cardinal..... he's done on hot press paper and the surface is smooth... it's easier to get fine crisp lines and better, i think, for reproduction...but in person, it is my opinion that he doesn't quite sparkle as much as he could. (that is my opinion, as my husband thinks he does)

my favorite brand of paper is twinrocker, hands down the top of the line paper.
i do also use fabriano artistico
i do NOT use arches, i don't like it.
i do however like canson100, which is also part of the arches family..... but for some reason canson works better for me then arches does.

there are other papers out there and others that i have tried but these work the best for the way i work.
normally

all the paper i use is 100% archival as well, so it should, with reasonable care, last at least 500 years. so will my pigments...........
not that i am any great master artist or anything but it's good to know that when it comes time for these original paintings to be sold, the buyers won't be facing faded or mutated colors, or deteriorating paper. properly matted and framed they will be around for a very long time.

a glimpse of one of the 'fails'

occasionally a painting is a total fail, and i recycle it.

2nd painting of a
chipping sparrow-recycled

i figured that i would show you all a total fail, and it only got worse after this!

there are elements of this chipping sparrow that worked but then overall it just was not something that made my heart leap when i set the brush down.....then i made it worse by redoing the background sort of an orange purple too. 

 also he's cramped into the plane of the painting, which made me feel like he was captured and flattened, not the feeling i wanted at all....so this is one of my recycles...

now the elements that did work for me, actually it was the colors! i really LIKED this the way it was as far as the colors go...and the modeling of the bird itself- and i even liked how the shadows and modeling of the branch came out...just enough without being over done but overall it just was not right.

on the plus side, HE is actually looking like a SHE since there is an egg bulge. 

*  anyone who is involved with birds on a daily basis will know exactly what that is-for the rest, it's the bulge just under the tail, indicating that an egg is waiting to be laid. i have ducks, chickens and budgies here, mainly girls, so that is something we notice   *

now my point being?

well each painting teaches the artist something, even a failure.

keeping trying as it is about the process of correcting what you did wrong, and reaching further towards what you feel is right.
repeating what you did right while stretching your comfort area with each different painting
and THAT part should never stop for an artist who's interested in growing.

3rd chipping sparrow

here is the third one i did of a chipping sparrow- i don't think the bird is quite as well modeled as the last one but i do believe there is more 'air' around him....

this was/is all part of the process i went through doing the work for the card project. i have nest paintings too the either didn't make it into the line up although they were good, because they didn't 'fit' the look

i though folks may find it interesting to see some of the 'out takes' that happened with this project

now as soon as i get a voice BACK, i intend on doing the voice over for the slide show...then this project goes live on kickstarter.....

one that i love, but didn't get into this set of cards

this is the oven bird.
they live in my area of pa on the forest floor, they make a really cool nest, which is what they are named after.
i loved this little bird so much.
after laying out all the birds in the series i decided that i would have to cut him.
it broke my heart as i really loved painting him, i loved learning about him, and his little feet in this painting just GOT ME.
(so did the orange striped cap)
i do tend to favor the ones that everyone overlooks.
in my mind this is as fascinating as a cardinal, but not as showy.
with THIS bird, you have to learn to appreciate the subtle shadings of feathers, and how amazingly well this bird is designed to hide in the mulch layer of the woods.
no he isn't the most eye catching of birds but that is the whole POINT!
cool huh?
maybe eventually i will do a series with these quite birds.....what do you folks think?


oh and we are getting better around here.
today i was able to get the ducks out (with help)

temporary setback due to

fast update today is tuesday sep 4...OMG i been sick all weekend (you don't want to know just how sick i was, i could NOT break a fever of 102.4) but i am better today, thank goodness
whatever this thing is that bernie gave me, i am STILL coughing really bad, and i hope i can sleep tonight as i wasn't able to for two nights as i could NOT breath, i almost went to the hospital ER it was so bad.
i figure another day if i can get some sleep then i should be fine and out of the nest should be back on track- thank you all for your continued support

the plague from the pits of hell..........(thanks to bernie....who shares EVERYTHING with me)

he shared a really bad cold this time, so bad my face is swollen!

so here is a page out of my journal, i know a few are unfinished but i need to order new ink for my fountain pen, please look at this for a while, and let me attempt to recover from this really really REALLY bad cold that has my poor face so swollen i can't focus my eyes!

and for the record, bernie is on the mend...... and he's barely coughing!

some PROGRESS!

i got a bit more done on scanning etc, my friend lana would like to see these paintings professionally scanned and i would also- i did find one more fine art scanning/printing company that i didn't know about so i am going to call them to see about scanning. because i scan them over and over and keep adjusting color to get them to look the same as on my screen but then i realized, that a printer will need them scanned for cmyk not rbg ( i know that MY printer wants them in cmyk, i can do color separations for that here) 

so monday i call another printer, and depending on costs i will figure that into the kickstarter budget. meanwhile, this is the line up of the paintings for the card project. plus the fledgling in the nest if we exceed the goal.  i am starting to get excited again. oh and the writer's block..... fading....

"hi, ..........and welcome .................et me introduce you to my project........'

on being an artist

i'm an artist

new paint table shelf-half finished

i look at the world from that view point

it's usually a bit left from center 

i observe

sometimes people don't like what i do observe

it sometimes gets people nervous

however, most often i don't even realize i have observed something until later

sometimes i see things that people really don't want me to see......

it's a curse and a gift and i get to live it daily

i was once told ( and by my brother of all people) that even if i took a 'break' from art i couldn't take a break from being an artist.....

because it was how my head was wired and i would continue to look at the world from that view point-and i continued to get better even when i was on a break!

guess he was right huh?

i LOVE what i do.....especially when the work is going well...... but even when it isn't going well, i would still rather doing this then anything else. 

i try, (sometimes without realizing it) to challenge myself with each painting...... then there is the ebb and flow of working....plus the inevitable questions back and forth

the dialog in my head goes something like this 

'i don't think i can pull this one off...'

'this is too advanced for me'

' i am so going to get this one' 

'totally'

'oops, oh shit'

'i need more brushes'

'WHY didn't i use heavier paper for this one, it's all freeken washes and now it's buckled.......(why didn't i stretch the paper)'

'oh LOOK a hawk ....( that would be said while 'resting' my eyes looking out the window)'

'coffee and icecream is a perfectly acceptable breakfast......' ( cause i paint early early sometimes)

'you need to layer like 7 different blues to get a hint of the right one'

'what the hell does this need? damned if i know'

'ok it's about to be recycled'

now that last one brings wails from the people who love me and follow my work......

but it is true some stuff really does need to be recycled.....

and if/when i chop it all up and then make scrap mixed media bookmarks or something out of it... 

well let's just say......that'll be between me and the studio ok?

the fact of being an artist is that you have a dialog going on in your head.....several actually, all at once

there is the technical part of you.... 'blue next to orange and they both pop' 

the human side of you ' wow, look at that beautiful bird......amazing'

the child side of you ' how much fun is this and let's add more color'

the adult side of you ' really i need to get the dishes washed'

and this all sort of swirls around while you work

that's why i am so glad when i get into that 'zone' which is a total meditative place

everything either shuts down but the work

or 

i just can't hear the other shit that is yacking away in my head

oh and somedays

there comes a finished painting that has me saying 

'holey shit! did i do that? na.....i must have been channeling leonardo.....cause honey i just ain't that good'

so there you go......

a glimpse into my head,---minus the screaming budgies, the music that sings little songs to me from a cd in the boom box, the drips and splashes of paint, the endless marketing, and the wish for a prettier studio like i see in all the magazines........(DOES any real work go on in them studios? damn i must be the sloppiest artist EVER)

til next time

color! seductive, distracting- and compelling

 here is a photo of one of the palettes i use painting nests, yes i really do use bright pure colors like that, i layer color over color in thin transparent layers and slowly build up colors.
i do the same when painting the birds for the out of the nest series
(the crows are a slightly different story, but we aren't talking about the crows now)
also in that photo is my garbage bag under my paint table and the folgers coffee "can" i use for rinse water.

 ( thaddeaus likes to drink the water, and i use colbalts and cadmiums)

i love the colors i use, each one made it onto the palette because first off they are light fast, second they are full rich lusty colors. if they didn't reach into my soul i wouldn't have them on my palette.
now normally i prefer black and white to color, because i know me....it's easy to get waylaid by the color and not pay attention to basics like form and modeling. so periodically throughout the painting i will run a photo of my progress through imaging software and turn it into grayscale to check if i still have things working. if they are fine, i continue painting.....if they don't work......well then decisions need to be made. some are simple......MORE DARKS in certain areas.... some aren't as simple....and may lead to a painting being recycled.
(yes i know... a lot of people start screaming at me when i say a painting is getting recycled.....but really if i say it's not good enough, it is NOT good enough- i can and will do better)

so it's not unheard of for me to do 4 or more paintings of the SAME thing...almost exactly, trying to 'get it right'.  it's not often thank goodness but if i have to i will

now the next picture is my palette as well, however this one is my palette chart. and yes i do this will ALL color (and sometimes even blk/wht in pencil) i draw it all down to tint....... i find it helpful on a few levels.
i get to work with the colors without having to have pressure to 'paint' something and i keep it on my drafting table if i need to remember the basics of a color....... it helps me make mixing decisions as well.
'mmmm that red is more orange.... so i'll pair it with that yellow which is also has orange in it....makes things brighter'
i label the colors with the pure pigment, MY numbering system (for color tests) and the color name.
actually i have four more colors on that chart now.. but that is the palette i used for the nest/bird paintings. and the new colors that were added recently were used in the holiday collection

for anyone involved with color, i would suggest a color palette chart.... i also do wash charts (especially of greens and purples, they seem to give me the most trouble)

so here is another behind the scenes of painting this series.....
meanwhile the quest for the voice over has been set down for the moment... i am painting crows and hoping that the muse comes back soon. i figure it's ok cause it's back to school time anyway..... but this all needs to be finished at least by the next two weeks and launched

til next time

just taking a break in the project to ask you all....

is this blog loading ok for you folks? 

are the pictures ok?

is there any problems with it at all? 

please let me know ok? you can leave it in the comments if you wouldn't mind 

vi

ps: this is a sneak peek at the first painting in the crow series, i am up to 10 now 

this is for my chicklet daughters

btw, i have to say, time away from my paintings is good for me, because then i get to see them with a fresh eye.. oh and another thing, painting indian corn I THOUGHT was going to be a nightmare, turns out it was a LOT of fun

(this whole painting was a lot of fun for me)

a few of the other paintings in this series

i LOVE this nest, i don't know why

 here are some of the other birds and nests in the series, they are thumbnails so very tiny i know- i have discovered that i need to color separate them then recombine them for the best images!

i have to say i do love what i do, i know that there are times when i am convinced that i can't paint my way out of a paper bag with a road map, but when it's working well for me, i truly do love what i do. it's so meditative for me- one of my friends tells me that what i do is my form of prayer and she just may be right. i feel so great when i finish a painting that is working. now that being said- if i don't think it's working i will not hesitate to recycle a painting. everyone gets so upset when i do that, but i think at some point, you need to trust your eye enough to say.....'this is crap and it's gone' or 'i can do better' or even 'this is really good let's stop now before we f* it up'
(and i have said all that and more at times)

i am actually painting the continuation of the crow series right now, while i work on this video for kickstarter, and i am up to number 10, although 9 has yet to be laid out.
this voice over is harder then i expected, so i keep hoping i will dream it. i love when i dream things out.
i have a few more series that i will start after out of the nest, and the crow series. but i enjoyed out of the nest so much, i do plan on a second 'out of the nest' series next year.
so i hope i get this video done soon, i don't feel too bad about it at the moment, as school just started and a lot of folks are busy getting thier offspring out of the nest so to speak. but i really hope next week or so to go live
bug me ok?